My Soul Trembles On

Thursday, April 24, 2008

It is strange, this valley that I now walk.

It is strange that I now walk, that I no longer stand still in utter fear and despair, that I step forward one trembling step at a time.

Above me and before me, I see the mountains I have roamed and climbed. I wish for the pinnacles I once reached. I miss the breathtaking views, the invigorating sense of God's nearness, the adventure, the daring.

But I am in the valley now, and it must be passed. It is not without beauty. I find rest from time to time, sunlight peering through the shadows of the valley-fog to remind me that it still exists.

I am afraid to pass through this valley. I don't know what waits for me along the way. I fear the challenge of the next mountain I may reach.

But afraid or not, I find myself walking. Harder than any climb I have ever attempted, the steps I take here are tremulous, uncertain. I am reminded that my expectation is from Him, that He is my Inheritance, my Provider. I question whether that Inheritance and Provision is enough for me.

I don't know. I will never know if I do not keep moving forward.

My way is not clear before me. Perhaps it will not be ever again.

I wonder if perhaps the strongest faith is not in the daredevil leap from a mountain's ridge, but in the tiny steps of a trembling soul toward the heart of a God who sent His own Son to die.

And death couldn't hold Him.

"I will bring the blind by a way they did not know; I will lead them in paths they have not known. I will make darkness light before them, and crooked places straight. These things I will do for them, and not forsake them."

~Isaiah 42:16


Lynette said...

YEP!!! One tremulous step at a time...

What you wrote reminded me so much of Much-Afraid in the book "Hinds Feet in High Places". It is a journey of both incredible depths and incredible heights and there is One constant through it all. :-)

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