Monday, July 25, 2005

My soul once sang with Arwen's hope,
Believing I was beautiful
And loved.
I loved once with her stubborn love,
Unwilling to believe that he could die,
That I could not be her.
Now my soul must laugh
In irony,
For he is not the man I loved.
His love, once true and strong,
Became not even pity;
His call, his life, his glory--
Now nothing but a name.

I cannot hear his name...
Which once was like my own.
I cannot see his face or hear his voice;
When the whispered memory comes,
The light is gone.
His eyes are gray, his heart seems cold.
Another must reach him now,
For I cannot.
Once I offered Arwen's light,
Once I left him not alone.
I prayed, I fought--
Yet he would not.
And I was left alone.

An epic novel not my own
Bleeds with someone else's pen
And I am not found in its pages.
No longer Arwen, without Eowyn's sword,
I do not know my name.
I knew I was not beautiful or someone to hold onto.
My passion was too much... and not enough.

An exiled princess,
I wandered, weeping
Left without a hope.
I failed the one I loved the most
And now for me the shame
Of having loved
And not been won.
Now my heart sings once again,
With a name I don't yet know.
I am beautiful

A princess once again
In a kingdom not my own.
Tried by fire, entranced by love
I long to be consumed.
My scars may never pass,
Though the memories may fade
I bear in all my love forever
A love that never won me,
A man who did not fight,
A hope that had to die.
My heart beats faster now
Anticipation pulls me to tomorrow's softer light

I want to know my name, yet
I'm afraid.
I have not strength or courage, nor hope
To battle on.
I've not the heart to persevere...
But I am loved.
I must believe that
I am loved.
Or I cannot go on.


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