Rememberies: Part the First

What greater thing is there for two human souls that to feel that they are joined... to strengthen each other... to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories.
~ George Eliot

Over on Pete's and my joint blog, I decided that for my own reference (because I'm forgetful) and for general recognition of how romantic Pete can be, I should post some of my favorite dates. I had only posted one, but it seems appropriate to repost at Restless Heart in this, my first romantic post of the week.

In keeping with my theme for this week, I think I shall post one of these "Rememberies" for each day.

My first remembery shall be the date that I remember as being our first evening when we were truly "together" for the first time.

For Christmas in 2004, before Pete and I became a couple, I had given myself a four-day stay in a bed and breakfast in Tappahannock, Virginia (actually, Pete had paid for about half of my stay as his Christmas present to me). My plan was to get away, just me and God, and refresh my tired soul with another foray into Scripture, as I had done the year before.

God, it seemed, had other plans.

Instead of sending me into Scripture, God started quizzing me about my feelings. He had been running a theme over Christmas about acknowledging Him in all my ways, and He seemed rather insistent at this point about the "all" part. "All" included emotions, He reminded me.

So I was suddenly faced with the prospect of continuing to stuff the growing feelings in my heart for Pete and lie to a God who knew what was going on anyway, or being honest with God and actually facing the feelings that I was pretty sure at that point were beyond friendship.

I'm sure you can guess how that dilemma played out. After two days of trying to avoid the issue, I was out of ideas on avoiding God. So we talked about it. I was terrified. I couldn't believe what I was thinking. I mean, I knew Pete was in love with me, but when a guy is faced with the actual prospect of marriage...

Then I called Pete. "Um, Pete, what if God isn't telling me to get as far away from you as possible?"

"I don't understand what you're saying."

"Um, I think I'm falling in love with you..."

And we talked about it. Until 4:00 in the morning we talked about it. Did he ever want it. He told me that on his way home for Christmas, he had told God he wanted to marry me.

*soft laugh* We must have solved the problems of the world that night, we talked so long. We covered our dreams about the future, things we had only thought about each other, how many children we wanted, and what we hoped our relationship could be. We talked about procedure, and our families, and what God wanted for us. A good part of the conversation consisted of "I can't believe this is happening..." I told Pete that I had worn my blue dress for him the night of the Christmas banquet, and he finally told me what he'd thought--I was breathtaking.

We were miles apart, but I had never felt so close to someone in my whole life. I knew that whatever came, we'd be in it together. At the end of the conversation, for the first time in my life, I heard a man who loved me tell me I was loved as I went to sleep.

It was the nicest, safest feeling in the world.