Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Wow. I've received a TON of comments on my post about my hair. Hello, world! I got so many comments on my hair that I'm starting to feel downright shallow for thinking about it so much! (Thanks for all the affirmation, peoples that I know and peoples that I don't know!) In fact, I feel so shallow that I feel like I ought to post something deep today.

But must admit, I don't have anything deep to post.

"Come on, Kelly - the world is watching!"

But today, I'm wiped. My imagination is out with the clouds that the sun is trying to break through. My daughter is clingy and fussy, even after a lovely walk in the 60-ish weather we've got today. My outdoor-cat-turned-house-cat is annoyed with me for not letting her outside. I have a project that I need to get done today and several others to continue working on.

And today is one of those days when I'm looking at God and going, "Just get me through to tomorrow so I will feel better, okay?"

I've had a lot of increased traffic to my blog, thanks to my recent entries in a photo contest over at I ♥ Faces and a shout-out from the lovely Emily over at Chatting at the Sky. As an "I-feel-loved-when-I-receive-words-of-affirmation" person, It's hard not to be constantly checking my email, soaking up comments - and programming my next post in my head to fit my audience.

But one of the things I've been finding in my life lately that I don't want to trade in for any amount of approval or affirmation or commentary is a little big thing called authenticity. It is the non-programmed approach to life. In recent months, I have been able to be authentic in my relationship with God, in my relationship with my husband, in my relationship with my daughter, with my friends.

A couple years ago, I would have traded my soul for "the right thing," as defined by... well, whoever could define it to me. Now, I can talk to God any time, in any mood, in any way that is me, knowing that He created me and He is working in me to change me in His time. Now, as I see what I am doing wrong, I don't always succumb to despair that I will never measure up to what I'm "supposed to be." I have found freedom to be who I am, daily yakking or wondering or conversing with my God and living life. It's the part with God that makes the living part abundant.

So I'm choosing authenticity here too. (And yes, I'm writing this to keep myself accountable.) Some days, I won't post because I won't have anything to say. Some days, I'll probably post five times because I have a LOT to say that isn't related to anything else I have to say.

This afternoon, I've got a project to finish, some playdough to make, and some pills to unpack. So now that I've stated my intentions for authenticity, it's off to the races again, and all that. ;-)


Melissa Stover said...

came here from chatting at the sky. love the look of your blog. i'll be back when all the kids aren't demanding me.

AP said...

came here from chatting up the sky. love finding other sisters in christ on here and seeing how we are all blogging nad striving to live clsoer to him. thank you

sunmamma said...

Great post! I feel this way too sometimes.

the Joneses said...

Hey, I found chatting at the sky from your blog... :)

I'm not much worried that you'll let acclimation corrupt your blogging. Kelly doesn't blog cotton candy and crowd-pleasers!

-- SJ

Hopefull said...

Really, authenticity is what will make anyone keep coming - I struggle with "the right thing" defined by who? and why do I care? It is freeing to just grow in who you are in Christ. Now Im off to read Hosea 2. Thanks!

Stephanie said...

Well said (and written). You have a great place here. I'm glad I found it! ;)

megs @ whadusay said...

For not having anything deep to post, you've definately given me something to think about! :)

I think about this a lot. Especially when it comes to blogging because you can somewhat create a new self in bloggy land (at least for the people who have never met you), which I don't want to do, most of the time anyway!

When the rubber meets the road, I want to be the me God Created in bloggy land, in real life, and in real, real life at home.

Great post!

Esther said...

yup, keep it real, or it gets boring real fast. that's what i like about your blog, unforced and interesting, awknowledging dependance on Him...

btw..i like your hair too...your profile shot in the corner.

The Scooper said...

Came over from Chatting at the Sky. I love this post! Especially the whole "trading my soul for the right thing." That was me for so long.

I also saw your pitch for the Salmon Oil. Will have to check it out. Thanks for sharing.

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