Counting Today

Monday, November 9, 2009


My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him.
- Ps. 62:5

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Someone called me an "expectant mother" today. I've not heard that one before. I mean, I have, but it wasn't about me. I guess it's true though. Six weeks from my due date, I am learning that silent wait, that God-expectation, that indefinable wonder that must have caused Mary's heart-pondering.

Every Monday, I check in at Ann Voskamp's Holy Experience, where she expands her list of a thousand God-gifts in photos and in words. I've shared a few "gratefuls of my own" here and there, but it is not easy for me.

I've been thinking for months that I'd like to join Ann's Gratitude Community, start listing and numbering and photographing what I find of God in my daily life. Recognize my expectation from Him.

But I am still learning what God-expectation looks like, how He meets it.

Piper is learning too. To count. You know, she can count to twelve now? Again and again, she practices on whatever comes to her mind to count. It's such a simple thing for a child to learn.

I'm too tired to choose anything but simple today, so I'll count with her, too tired to get up and dance with her; I hold and rock and count teardrops that don't make much sense except for feeling.
One - I noticed my shadow on Saturday. Straight on, it is still my own shadow. When I turn to the side, I see life that is not my own.

Two - We thought about moving from this little house to a bigger house recently. But the sun lives here almost all the time, and it paints everything with the most lovely light.

Three (or Phree, as Piper would say) - I don't know what I would do without the man I married, who I would be if he were not in my life. I can't imagine loving or being loved by anyone who isn't him.

Four - I caught little bare feet on camera, running through cold water-reflection at sunrise.

Five - We had a quiet moment alone yesterday, wondering how we can afford to have any more money removed from Pete's small paycheck to pay taxes and fines on something we can't use, with two children now and my health issues. God is still God.

Six - Nanook is putting out her "kitty want ad," begging kittens or a $200+ operation. Our friends gave us a ticket for a free spay. The next day, our neighbors gave us seven coupons for free kitty litter, all good through April. And several more coupons for free dry food.

Seven - The pregnant pain is building slowly to its climax. I am still breathing. I have only six weeks left.

Eight - I caught Piper smelling the flowers on her dress this morning. I love that she finds beauty already.

Nine - Promises kept make memory that breathes over and over again.

Ten - We had a visit from two of my siblings come down from college this weekend. It was good to get to know them a bit more.

Eleven - For breakfast, I ate farm fresh eggs. The kind that have deep golden yolks because the laying hens get to eat bugs all day. (I don't think I want to know why the bugs make the yolks so healthy and flavorful. Something to do with the Omega-3 proteins...)

Twelve - My little girl dances. And hops. "Pop, pop, pop!" all over the house.
I think it may take us a while to reach a thousand...

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This post also linked at Holy Experience for One Thousand Gifts.





(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

6 comments:

Glynn said...

"Expectant" in the sense of the blessing that is coming. Good post.

Melissa Stover said...

you are due about the same time i was last year. i remember having a lot of the same thoughts.

Maureen said...

You are well on your way, Kelly. That's enough.

Namaste.

(P.S. I really like No. 8. . . the innocence and sweetness and appreciation of beauty implied.)

Anonymous said...

Welcome to the gratitude community. Your list is lovely.

Crystal said...

I have enjoyed reading your blog and seeing your beautiful pictures on the photography blog. They are gorgeous! Praying that your new little one will arrive safely. And you will be amazed at how quickly your gratitude list will grow - God is so good :))

Unknown said...

I loved reading this post. I'm like you...for months I have wanted to join Ann's gratitude community but something keeps holding me back. You have inspired me to begin my gratitude journey...to just start counting today.

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